Wednesday, August 27, 2008

My Homage to Food Porn

I’m starving right now. I’ve been stuck in meetings all day, I have another one coming up, and I don’t have any cash on me to raid the vending machine. People, I have been reduced to trolling the Internet looking for PICTURES of food. I am a desperate woman who isn’t afraid to share that fact with the world.

Behold…temptation:


God I miss pigs in a blanket.


I don’t know what those are, but they look awesome. Right?


Fuck I’m hungry.


Melty cheese just makes everything better.


I know I’m not allowed to eat these anymore, but that doesn’t mean I can’t look.


Mmmm, pasta. I could eat like 12 plates of that...right now.


Hey, did you know Rugelach was spelled like it is? How weird is it that I did? Is anyone listening to me right now?


The only thing that’s missing here is a scoop of ice cream. Oh wait, I think there's one in the background. Fuck I’m hungry.

Okay, that’s it – oh wait, I’m going to need to end this right.



Aaannnddd, now I’m done. Sorry about that guys - sometimes I just need to use this site to vent.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's posts like this that I find really make my life look normal. Thanks for that. Even if you do only post a couple times a month . . .

Anonymous said...

I'm going to the MN state fair tomorrow - I'm pretty sure I could mail you something more exotic. . . how about SPAM curds? Or a deep fried chocolate chip cookie on a stick? I know I shouldn't make light of eating disorders, but I may purge tomorrow night just on general principle.

Redhead said...

anon: Hey, that's two posts this week you ingrate!

alex: How sad is it that the deep fried chocolate chip cookie on a stick sounds good to me? Sadly, I'm pretty sure it wouldn't travel well.

Anonymous said...

On vacation back home again in Indiana and loving it. I am the kinda guy who is very loyal to his watering holes and feed troughs so it has been a great week. Since I am a bit of a personality (i don't know another way to put it) and since I tip well and tell self deprecating stories I sometimes find my patronage enjoyed. Given that, I have only had to pay for one meal since my prodigal return and I am loving it. Not that I am particularly cheap, but you know they love you when you don't have to tell them what you are having and instead of a bill the waitress kisses your cheek and says, "Its on me." God blessed me with a square jaw and straight teeth and they have given everything I needed, a Nick's burger and a beer. Indiana IS Xanadu

Redhead said...

paine: Awww, Paine actually sounds happy. This is so strange and new. As for Indiana being Xanadu...well, um, I'm pretty sure you're the only person in the history of the world who's ever said/thought that, but...great. I'm glad you're happy!

As for me dear readers, I have to work today (damn job), but then I'm off to...New Jersey? (ah fuck) for a night or two. At some point I'll come back to NYC to spend a day or two this weekend getting in trouble, so cross your fingers for some good stories on Tuesday.

Anonymous said...

I would like to correct one factual error: the deep fried chocolate chip cookies were NOT served impaled on a stick. They were delicious, though.

Unknown said...

Aaaargh, I'm sat here in work starving and you post THIS?

Oh god...that burger...