Monday, January 14, 2008

Happy Birthday to Me!

OK, I know I dropped off the face of the earth there for a little while and…um…sorry about that. Short version of what’s been going on: Work’s been more than a little nuts (no, I don’t want to talk about it) – I haven’t even visited this little blog in the past week much less anyone else’s, Christine’s life has been falling apart (she got offered a job and then the offer was taken back when her references came back bad – yeah, ouch), John’s not talking to me, and…

Wait, let me tell the John story – so I started seeing this guy just about a week ago (it’s new and yet not – we’ve known each other for a little while). Some problems with this new relationship: 1) He’s 23. I know, I know – now that I’m on the north side of my 20s this is officially robbing the cradle. Oops. 2) This guy happens to work with John and is a friend of his. Double oops. I am now in what we laymen like to call ‘trouble.’


Hmmm, what else? Oh right, so two weeks ago I’m out with Linda (again), we somehow meet up with a friend from high school (actually, I went to elementary school with this dude and haven’t seen him since we graduated), I got drunk and start chatting up a huge guy with a shaved head, tattoos, and a tongue ring. And then (ugh) I left with said huge dude with the tongue ring (nothing happened – get your heads out of the gutter).

Anyway ever since then I’ve been getting phone calls from people I grew up with and haven’t spoken to in forever (on purpose). Everyone wants to know what’s going on with me and if the rumors are true. ‘Um, what rumors?’ I asked. No one will tell me, but I can guess. Fuck. Conclusion: You never outgrow high school.

And…shit, what else do you guys want to know? Oh yeah, my birthday is this week – I am NOT excited about it. I’m pretty much convinced that every birthday after 21 is a complete buzzkill anyway but still…this one is already annoying. I mean sure, I’m pretty much guaranteed of drinking and eating for free for the next week or so, but this shit is getting old (as am I). I’ve been going out every fucking day already and have plans almost EVERY NIGHT this week.

Now all of that may sound good in theory, but in reality it’s tiring. All I want is a night to myself, and that’s not going to happen for another 7 days or so. Oh, and I’m another year older. And one of my best friends isn’t talking to me. And another friend is as depressing as hell. And a bunch of people I went to 3rd grade with think I’m a slut. But hey on the bright side – free cake!

Hee hee – just got off the phone with my sister. She’s drunk right now and that makes her really funny. Also funny (only not) is that my sister broke up with her dickhead boyfriend. Again. Well that didn’t last long! It would be sad if it weren’t so entertaining (and if I weren’t so happy they’re not together anymore…for now of course – they’ll be back together next week). Still – she deserves better.

Random rant: What the fuck is up with the ending to the movie Titanic? Does this shit piss anyone else off or just me? Things that annoy the shit out of me about the ending:

1) Why does SHE get to float on the piece of wood but not Jack? And if he insisted that she get on first, why didn’t she get on for a little while and then got off and give him some time out of the water? Would that be so fucking hard? What a cow.
2) When he makes her promise to live – for him – why doesn’t she ask the same of him. Isn’t love a two-way street? What, is her life worth more? Way to be a fucking selfish bitch!
3) When she, as an old lady, throws the necklace into the water, I keep thinking ‘Um…why?’ What’s the logic there? What purpose does throwing away the necklace serve? She’s held onto it all her life so clearly she doesn’t need to let go of her past NOW. And it’s not like the necklace meant anything to Jack, so returning it to the water, aka His Grave, means nothing either (a moot theory if you will). Nor did it belong to the ship – so metaphorically returning it to the ship doesn’t make any sense either.
4) And finally, the crew on the Titanic expedition – the group that took her in, were nothing but nice to her, listened to her long-ass story, and who were (I imagine) spending a lot of money looking for that necklace – got repayed for their kindness by getting fucked over. Instead of handing over to them what they want (and she so clearly doesn’t), she just throws it away. Like a giant Fuck You to them. And she throws it into the ocean, pretty much guaranteeing that they’ll never find it. While never telling them! Final conclusion: What a bitch!

Yeah, that’s all I’ve got for today. Anything going on with you guys that you want to share? Until next week party people – don’t do anything I wouldn’t do…or would actually…


Bella said...

Okay, so maybe I'm not so jealous of your life anymore!

Happy Birthday in advance though.


Jack Cobra said...

You think the birthday stuff is tough on you??? I'm preparing for my girlfriends birthday this week and it's been pure stress. I mean, have you ever tried looking for a gift for a woman after you just used your best ideas on her Christmas gift? Christ. Fuck. Shit. It's not my blog, so I can cuss.

As for's a movie.

Sadly, when you said that John isn't talking to you it made me think that he's a pretty good guy. I'm not sure what that means, but it was my instant reaction.

TK said...

Blah blah happy birthday blah blah.

Your dating life is a tornado of the bizarre. It's fascinating. Like watching praying mantises mate. So, thanks for that.

Welcome back to the world. And on the bright side, your life isn't a full-blown distast-o-rama like Christine's. So you've got that going for you.

rs27 said...

Did I just read a diatribe on the ending of Titanic? Really? I hate movies where you know what the ending is.

Um, the ship sinks. I pretty much knew that.

Haha, "laymen" Ha, I'll go now.

Anonymous said...

I think I liked your other job better - you had more time to blog. Listening to your life makes my life feel more normal. Anyway - Happy Birthday!

Redhead said...

bella: You were jealous of MY life? Well that was your first mistake.

jack: That was not a compliment to me - way to make me feel good about myself on my birthday dude, that's just what I needed to make this day even better.

tk: Thank you, that was just...yeah.

rs27: I pretty much assumed everyone had seen Titanic, so I didn't feel even a little bad about talking about the end of the movie. Having said that...ah, who cares?

anon: I'm so glad my life is such a shitstorm that it makes everyone else feel better. And with that - I'm off to be old today.

Jack Cobra said...

Uh....Happy Birthday

Jez said...

The ONLY question I have about the Titanic is that after all these years of it having been released, why would anyone still watch it, let alone wonder about the plot? That's sorta like asking if "quality" ingredients were used in a Pizza Hut pizza.

Jez said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Welcome back and Happy Birthday! I'm such an ego-maniac I still demand a lot of attention on my birthday. Makes me seem a little gay, not that there's anything wrong with that.

And Titanic sucks ass. If it weren't for Kate Winslet's sumptuous 19-year old breasts, there would be no reason to watch that pile of crap.

onthevirg said...

I'm a little late on this but, Happy Birthday!

And I gotta agree with Harry, Titanic = big bowl full of sweaty ass. Hate that flick.

Anonymous said...

happy birthday red! i had a feeling you were Aquarius. not that that is supposed to mean anything, so don't read into it...but i'm curious: what do you think these "rumors" are about? if i had that shit going on with people around me, SOMEONE would be giving some answers...

and yes, i have to completely agree with harry; there is no reason in the world to watch titanic other than kate winslet's nakie time.