There’s a girl in my office who’s getting married this weekend. She’s been planning the wedding for-fucking-ever, but I’m pretty good at tuning people out so it never really got on my nerves before now. (Generally speaking, if I’m not related to you or I’m not REALLY good friends with you, I don’t care what your dress looks like, what flowers you’re going to carry, or what ‘color-scheme’ you’re going for. That’s just an FYI.) But this week…holy shit.
Don’t get me wrong, I know weddings take a lot of planning, are (unnecessarily) expensive, and can stress a (relatively) normal person out. I understand all of this. I just don’t want to hear about it. But holy shit there are a lot of women who do.
Note: I’m not a monster or a bitter spinster, I swear to you I’m not, but I don’t understand big weddings. They just seem so wasteful. And yes, unnecessary. I say give me a beach, family, and a HUGE cake (shut up, we all have our thing), and I’d be good to go. It would be like a vacation/wedding, no superfluous people needed or invited. Perfect, right? But where was I?
Oh yes, the squealing. What’s with all the fucking squealing?
Let me explain – for the past 2 weeks, every time the bride-to-be has mentioned the wedding, all the women in the office have starting squealing. And it’s getting on my fucking nerves. I swear to God they’re making noises only dogs can hear. Is this a female thing? Please tell me I’ve never made those sounds in my life, I…I just couldn’t live with myself if I have. I mean, no wonder men think we’re all insane – at least a good majority of us just might be.
Horrifying thought for the day.
That is all.